Getting Off

In the silence of motion, my memory triggers all that hurt me. All that was in the past but feels like brand new. I know in my heart that Satan is pulling my leg with it. But the wound feels fresh and gently throbs through my heart.

That day in chaos of the mid morning. When he came and tried talking to me to just be settled with his decisions. Me doing my best keeping him there. But through and through, I no longer live in his heart. It belonged to someone else. It was a blank wall with volatile colours of black, red and thorns in the chest.

I made the journey to the registrar's where he files in petition to separate. Stupified by the sight of support of his brother there, but I came with my mother, my bestfriend, siblings and uncle. My uncle had a bypass few months and his chest was hurting throughout the whole ordeal. He couldn't get through the lobby. Best he waited in the car.

Made me feel zero. Everything felt stripped from my skin down to my bones. But these were the flashes of memories that pains me every once in a while.

In current times, we are past all that. But this INFJ in me does this self torture on auto mode.

Happily holding hands and kisses in codes that we only understand. The other minute all these things come flooding through.

It is not with feelings of resentment. It's just something natural to feel. But then again, I'm tired. Who knows what I'm talking about right now. My eyes are seeing double.

Must leave.

Good night.